"I'm Maximus! I am the lovely puppy you have been searching for. You may notice that I am thick and stocky, which is ideal and adds to my attractiveness. If you take me home I will be obedient and a fantastic companion! Pick me! I’m ready to share my love. I am current on all of my vaccinations and vet checked from head to tail, so when I see you I will be as healthy as can be.”